Using humour to deal with challenges is, in my opinion, the best way to cope. If you can’t laugh, there’s only one other alternative – cry. Such was the situation this morning. And this afternoon. And I’m 99% sure will be the situation many more times before I complete this degree. Entirely sure this post will turn into a stream of consciousness but so much happened today!!
Charlotte and I were meeting at uni for a coffee catch-up at 11; it’s been so long since I’ve sat down with her and I’ve really missed her! She just ‘gets’ me – we’re very much on the same wavelength but she usually waits for me to come out with totally inappropriate remarks before saying “oh thank god you think that way too! I thought it was just me!”… Luckily I can always be relied upon to bring the unusual and the inappropriate 😉
So anyway, I left home at 10:20, thinking 25 mins drive in, 15 minutes to find a park… Should be sweet. But the following is what ensued… the texts that flew between us as we vented our frustrations… while we sat in line for 45 minutes to get a car park at uni
Whilst waiting for one of my students from last semester to show up, we got onto the topic of people who are used to other people doing everything for them… and how much those people irritate us. Whatever happened to standing on your own 2 feet????? Especially as women! It’s critical that you can survive on your own. Maybe men love it, maybe men hate it… I have no idea. It’s not even just from a relationship standpoint; the real world demands that you be self-sufficient, reliable and able to think quickly and perform tasks efficiently. You don’t get to be that way by tilting your head to one side, flashing a cute smile and getting others to do everything for you. There should be subjects in self-sufficiency, common sense and independence at uni.
One of the hardest things when I was running my own business was taking on work experience students – who couldn’t think on the fly or think ahead to save themselves. Always just waiting for instructions on the most simple things. As a potential employer, I wasn’t impressed. It was just so frustrating and I’m seeing it everywhere – and apparently Charlotte is too. So we pretty much just sat there being grateful we are from an era where common sense is a virtue.
When my ex-student arrived, we all chatted for another 45 mins before leaving Charlotte to head to class (me to teach, her to be a student). It was then that she told me ‘Actually I’m not going to class… I’m deferring because I’m pregnant.” My heart was absolutely bursting with joy for her! I threw my arms around her and let her know how much I’d miss her, to which she said she’d driven all the way from the Gold Coast just to see me and Shane (her fellow mature age student buddy) – the people who had made her time at uni so special 🙂 She is such a sensational, down-to-earth person and I wish her the absolute best with all the wonderful things her future has in store.
Teaching was somewhat dramatic today, running from one side of campus to the other, redistributing myself between digital and analogue classes as required because one of our fellow tutors was sick. Which was fine until I left my phone on the other side of campus 🙂
(insert stream of expletives)
Today WAS brilliant though… there is nothing more exciting to me than First Years feeling enthused about design projects and today their excitement was palpable. Some of the boys (the straight ones) expressed that they enjoyed the space planning activities in Vis so much more than the ‘airy fairy’ Design projects and thought maybe they would swap to Architecture because they thought they would do more of it there. My response was “absolutely not”.
These boys are really technically focused so my advice to them with their design projects was to settle on a solid concept but then to play to their strengths and make it about what they enjoy. So try to represent their concepts through strong space planning, materiality and form. By focusing on the nuts and bolts. I think I got through to them – I really hope I did. You’re at uni for a lot of years – you have to make it about what you enjoy or it makes you miserable.
(Mental Note: Take own advice.)
Then this evening the day came full circle when I found this in my newsfeed on Facebook. It really brought home what Charlotte and I were talking about at lunch – the importance of independence. This is talking about financial independence but as soon as I read it, I thought “A-friggin-men”.
I can’t think of anything worse than being reliant on someone financially or using them to improve your lot in life. Where is the satisfaction you’d get from working for what you have? Where is the pride in knowing you made it on your own? Maybe I’m just old-fashioned or maybe that’s just the way things are done now but I believe in always paying what you can, particularly in a relationship. The problem with being a non-contributing trophy is that eventually trophies get old and tarnished. I don’t ever want to be in that position. I want to be able to bring things to a relationship financially, romantically, intellectually and so on. Basically be perfect. After all, that’s not very hard to be 😉